The Apostle Paul describes Last Days Narcissists for us in The Bible. He tells young Pastor Timothy that in the Last Days, people will be “lovers of self”, or Narcissists. Here he gives us a play-by-play of what toxic Narcissism is like: self-lovers, wanting what others have, boasters, proud, no gratitude, ungodly, slanderers, liars, no self-control, fierce, despisers of God-good, traitors, reactionary with fits of rage, hedonistic lovers of pleasure more than lovers of God, having a form of godliness without true Godly power. Then Paul makes a powerful statement that one doesn’t hear often. He says, “...from these, STAY AWAY.” (2 Timothy 3:1-5; PureWord, Monandic Translation).
Apostle Paul’s description of narcissism is like reading pages out of the DSM-5 (Diagnostic & Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders, American Psychiatric Association, Fifth Edition, 2013, Pages 669-672).
We often assume Narcissism is easily recognized, or Overt. But the truth is many narcissists are Covert, manifesting their behaviour to an individual or a select few. This is especially difficult for the recipient, as the Covert Narcissist often presents themselves vulnerable and abused to their gathered allies.
“We can all act abusively. But when those actions become patterns and cycles of abusive behaviour, we have now moved into a different, and diagnosable, realm."
It is important to understand that Narcissistic Personality Disorder, whether Overt or Covert, is an extremely specific mindset, with extremely specific behaviours, requiring an extremely specific therapeutic protocol. Do not settle for any professional who does not have this specialized insight. If you do, it will hinder your healing journey rather than help you. Please contact me to set up your personalized appointment.
Possible Traits of OVERT Narcissist Personality Disorder
- deep sense of entitlement
- exaggerated sense of self
- lack of empathy; can be extremely dangerous for those in their care
- distorted view of reality
- demean, intimidate, and bully others as a way of communicating
- needs to be in control of others
- unrealistic view of perfectionism
- lack personal accountability, often blaming others for their lack
- lack healthy boundaries
- fragile ego drives need for attention and validation
- difficulty validating another’s pain
- vulnerability challenges
- speak over or interrupt others
- deny others reality
- forgets or denies factual events
Possible Traits of COVERT Narcissist Personality Disorder
- abuse done in secret
- perpetual victim
- easily offended
- highly passive/aggressive
- fragile ego
- self-absorbed, unless other-focus benefits their plight
- in competition with the other in close relationship
- often vacillating between better-than and less-than mindset
- subtle and secret, making them dangerous
- extremely envious and insecure
- lacking empathy
The clearest evidence of a sociopathic narcissist? He turns your kids against you. ~ Dr. David Clarke
Journey to Surviving a Narcissist
1) Realizing the truth2) Expanding your mind3) Getting the correct help4) Using your inner wisdom the walk out of the darkness and into the light5) Sustaining your change
If you, or someone you know, are dealing with this kind of unhealthy conflict please contact me for more information. And, be especially careful of who you ask to speak into your life when dealing with your precious information.
Remember, many therapists and professionals DO NOT understand Narcissistic Abuse in relationship and could offer “help” that actually harms you and those you love.
Note: This information is intended to, 1) offer hope and help to those who are in relationship with someone they believe has Narcissistic Personality Disorder, and 2) offer freedom to the few NPD’s who are willing to do the work to change, in order to be set free.
Say “NO” to narcissists ... Jesus did.
